Steamy self-promotion

Now, to the matter I was originally planning to post on, before I was so rudely interrupted...

I’m not sure whether it was an idea brought on by a feverish night’s sleep, or an unconscious after-effect of reading some of Spanky’s funny posts, but waking one morn I thought it would be fun to do a silly parody; a plug for a made-up erotic book. I’m sure such a thing will have been done before, but hey.

Let’s see. First we need a title. This should of course follow the erotic book/movie naming convention of adjective-noun, with both ideally leaning towards the suggestive end of the vocab scale. You know, things like Forbidden Hunger, or Secret Passion.

I’ve got it. Steamy Obsessions. Ooh!

Now we need a cover. It’s got to have some female flesh on it... and a certain hint of suburban eroticism... what better than a stock photo of a woman taking a shower? Like this one:

Add the cover text, and hey presto:

Steamy!

Now I just need to write some blurb. Let’s start with the character names. There are three principal figures in the story, the first being the horny, sexy female protagonist and the second being her horny, sexy male paramour. She can be Amarynth Foster and he can be Kent Ambridge. Nice realistic-sounding names. And the third point in our little love triangle can be the sultry Raquel Conchitez.

Okay. Now for the hard sell!

Raquel is a young woman with needs. What she needs is the brooding, muscular Kent, but he’s already taken – by her best friend! What sensual lures will the Latino temptress employ to get what she wants? Will red-blooded (and well-hung) Kent be able to resist her wiles (and her perfect body)? What will happen when two overly-sexed women clash over one man? Might it involve them getting naked in the shower together and having some lesbian fun? Is Amarynth’s shower big enough for all three lovers to get in? Read the sex-packed Steamy Obsessions and find out... (Several further posts on the subject to follow).

Eew. I feel like I could use a shower myself now.