Monday, 31 December 2012

Ring out the fast, ring in the true

New Year’s Eve; I can hardly believe it! It only seems like yesterday that I was travelling down to see my family (it was actually nine days ago) and last week that I was writing about Halloween (two months ago). I’d like to thank everyone who has visited my blog in 2012, and I send grateful hugs to everyone who has been kind enough to leave a comment*: it’s really encouraging to know that my scribblings are of interest. I will do my best to keep on improving and hopefully making the world a teeny bit brighter and spankier in 2013.

I have met many, many lovely people over the course of the year, and discovered a wealth of fascinating spanking blogs, and for that I am grateful. I look forward to making even more new friends in the year to come.

I wrote the perfect NLW New Year’s post this time last year so I won’t try to top that for sauciness. I don’t have a picture as wonderful as the one I used then, for a start. And I figure you can only weave a little vignette juxtaposing NYE celebrations with school roleplay so many times. I simply hope that you all have a fun time tonight and that the new year brings only good things. (That includes spankings, bondage, and any other kinky stuff you happen to enjoy, of course).

This post, you may be interested to know, is number two hundred on my blog. I know that every blogger says this but I’m really proud of myself for reaching such a mark: after ten posts I wondered if I would be able to think of enough things to reach twenty. Thanks to imreadonly2 and Sir Daniel for their guest posts! (Though I guess that means I’m only on 198 really). Even more amazing than reaching 200 posts, to me at least, is that my humble little blog will turn two years old on Jan 25. Time really does fly when you’re having fun :)

Happy New Year, everyone!

*Everyone except this guy, that is. “Finish the fucking story!” indeed.

Sunday, 30 December 2012

The wonders you can do

I rather skipped over the non-kinky gifts I received for Christmas in this post, but I want to write a little bit about one in particular that BH bought me: a DVD of series 1 of Wonder Woman. (Yes, the TV show from the 1970s). Utterly fantastic. I don’t know if there are enough superlatives to fully capture its awesomeness, in fact.

Colourful, camp, funky, it’s like a blast of concentrated Americana. Never a bad thing. And what a great character WW is! Like all great characters she can of course represent all kinds of things to different people but to me she represents, above all, an uncompromisingly positive expression of femininity. I mean that in all seriousness, in case you were wondering: it’s this that transcends the comic-book structure of the show and sets it light years above things that are superficially similar, like the 1960s Batman TV show.

As her name might suggest, Wonder Woman can do all kinds of superhero-type ‘wonders’, but I think that these are purely allegorical to her real strength: her self-belief. (Just as her battles with various villains are allegorical to the ordinary woman’s various negotiations with the world). She personifies a paradigm of female dynamism, confidence and self-determination; a worldview in which women need not think themselves dependent upon men, or in any way secondary to them. With or without the star-spangled hotpants she is a woman who doesn’t need a big, strong man to help her deal with her problems; she’s a woman who takes no baloney and kicks righteous ass when it needs to be kicked, all without sacrificing one iota of her feminine essence. YEAH!

The significance of her being on the side of ‘right’ can’t be overstated, btw: traditionally, powerful women have been synonymous with evil and/or unnaturalness, as if a non-passive woman is an aberrance (think witches and the countless villainesses and wicked stepmothers of folklore and Western literature). Wonder Woman tears that particular rulebook up and shows that women can be strong and ‘good’. The show is easily as radical as anything Hélène Cixous and friends have written, and is IMO way more significant as it is right there in the centre of the American cultural mainstream.

The message of the show to me is that if one woman can liberate herself to think that way, then all women can, regardless of circumstances or context. I’m not ashamed to say that she’s a heroine of mine.

She also happens to have the coolest costume ever. I think I might have to put ‘Wonder Woman outfit’ at the top of my wish list for next Christmas. (Just wish I had a butt like Lynda Carter’s).

This post is nearly-but-not-quite a kinky think, btw, as it invites a think about feminism and kink, particularly on how one can reconcile (and justify to others) being an independent woman with being a submissive in a M/F (or F/F) relationship, but I’ll save that think for another time.

P.S. Does anyone else hear the WW theme music and want to rush off and fight crime that very instant?

P.P.S. I did dress up in my gym kit yesterday evening and was given a jolly good spankering over BH’s knee, skirt up, knickers down... and I did wail and promise to be a good girl in future and never ever to skip school again. I came so hard when BH fucked me afterwards that I thought I was going to explode. BLISS! (I’m sure any Martian readers will be very confused by this post).

Saturday, 29 December 2012

A Penny in a pear tree


I’m back from my stay with my family and am safely ensconced in my little lair once again. I hope you have all had lovely holidays and have lots of new toys to play with (do tell)! I myself mainly got things to wear and things to eat (that is, enough choklit to see me to April) but way better than the things – lovely as they are – was just getting to see my folks.

Now I’m back with BH and am seriously hankering for a spankering... we’ll hopefully see to that later tonight! And I’m very happy to report that I have not one but two brand new kinky garments to play in: a maroon gym skirt and a grey school pinafore. Oh, they are lovely! And what a nice decision to have to make... I think I might have to play in my netball kit first. The scenario writes itself, after all: naughty Penny skips netball practice (and fibs about it) and Daddy is most displeased... oh! I wonder if a certain little madam is going to be taught a painful lesson? One that involves her pretty pleated skirt being flipped up and her gym knickers yanked down?

It’s for her own good, after all... ;)

Saturday, 22 December 2012

Back in five (days) or so

I’m off today to stay with my family for the holidays*, so my little blog is going to be quiet for a bit. (I still need to pack so I’d better get on with it!)

I just wanted to take this opportunity to wish you all a very happy, fun, peaceful Christmas. I hope you get everything you want, need and deserve. (And maybe some presents, too).

See you soon!

Love, Penny xxx

*We won’t be playing Kinkopoly, I hasten to add!

Thursday, 20 December 2012

Fun for all the family

Stuck for something to do with the folks this Xmas? Want your ease of sitting to be decided on the roll of a dice? Got a thing for guys in top hats?

Then you need to play Kinkopoly!

A game of chance and skill for people who like things a bit twisted, Kinkopoly lets you realise that long-cherished dream of spanking and being spanked whilst pushing natty little figurines round with your finger.

Move around the board, collect your favourite kinks, and give and receive jolly good hidings as you go: the winner is the one who begs for mercy last!

No two games are ever the same, especially given the vagaries of the Chance and Community Chest cards...

Oh dear!

Oh yes!


Kinkopoly – the most fun you can have with (some of) your clothes on! Available from all good sex shops and Wal-Mart.

(The wonders of a paint program and a silly imagination...) ;D

N.B. Any similarity to a popular ‘property trading’ board game is entirely coincidental.

Tuesday, 18 December 2012

Midnight and moonlight and bright shining stars

Sorry about the relative quietness: this time of year is quite hectic, isn’t it? I haven’t had as much time to spend on my little blog as I might ordinarily, so apologies. I’ve got all my present-buying done though, so that’s one thing at least. Just need to wrap them now.

It was the office Christmas party on Friday (do they have those in other countries? Office parties, that is, not Fridays) and I will confess I did get plastered pleasantly merry. Free bar! No spankable naughtiness (as far as I can recall) though, sorry. Or does drinking too much, flirting, saying everything MUCH TOO LOUD, dancing suggestively with other girls and generally being a raucous an effervescent little madam in a low-cut frock and impractical heels count as being naughty? Hopefully not. (Thank goodness it was on a Friday rather than a Thursday like last year, btw. World class lie-in with a thumping headache the following day!)

I’ve got a very silly thing (nearly) ready that I hope will amuse you, so that will hopefully go up midweek. Right now I have a moderately silly thing in the form of a Christmas-themed limerick. Based on a true story, as they say:

What Girls on the Naughty List Get

When Penny was sent in to see
Mr Claus about being naughty,
Her charms cut no ice
And in half a trice
She found herself over his knee.

Thursday, 13 December 2012

Searching for Santa

Not, as you might assume, a festive reworking of Waiting for Godot, but a silly little something that I spotted in my blog stats; specifically an amusing little juxtaposition in the section that tells me the things folks have typed into search engines prior to visiting The World’s Best Blog*:

Now, admittedly I am getting lots of searches for Santa-related spankiness at the moment, (tis the season!) and people of course find my blog by entering my name into Google, but still... hmf! Me, being spanked by Santa! Just imagine such a thing!

Just imagine...

...poor, sweet, innocent me, held firmly in place across Santa’s lap... my pretty blue party dress pinned up against my back by his heavy hand... my pink cotton knickers twisted humiliatingly round my flailing ankles... my little face a picture of sorrow and wet with tears... and all the while Santa’s other hand merrily slaps my squirming bare cheeks the vivid red colour of his suit. “Ow! Ow!” I yelp, sounding for all the world exactly like a naughty little brat getting just what she needs and deserves. “Ho-ho-ho!” Santa chuckles, the big, jolly, old meanie.

It would all be rather like this, I suppose! :D

*The world’s best blog called ‘Naughty Little Writer’, anyway. (Unless there’s another one someplace).

Wednesday, 12 December 2012

I winned something!

As many of you know, Ana is running an Advent Calendar game over on her blog: each day readers can win prizes by commenting. And today I won one! Yay for me!

Yay for Beth, too, actually: I nominated her for a prize of Mrs Claus so she wins that :)

This is honestly the first thing I have ever won – thank you, Ana!

Tuesday, 11 December 2012

A picture post

Because I yap enough and you deserve a break, and because these images can speak for themselves. (They’re of the little Christmas tree I have on my desk). Click for bigness and optimum festivity:


Saturday, 8 December 2012

Dear Santa, love Penny

Wanna see something cute and Christmassy? And by cute I mean really goshdarn cute? (You just know this is going to involve Little Penny, don’t you?) ;D

The young Miss Hasler, like many, many other little girls and boys the world over, writes a letter to Santa each year. Her Daddy tells me that she penned this year’s missive – in her very carefullest handwriting, on her special snowy notepaper, mais oui – on Thursday evening, lying on the rug in front of the fire, so deep in concentration that she didn’t answer when asked if she would like a yummy hot chocolate. (Daddy brought her one anyway). Trust me, that says a lot about the importance of the undertaking.

I feel a bit mean showing Penny’s sekrit and confidential correspondence to you but it is just too sweet not to share. Don’t worry, it will of course be safely delivered to Santa right after this. I hope reading it gives you the same warm feeling inside that it gave me. And I hope Penny gets everything she asks for.

Sorry... think I might have something in my eye. *sniff*

Thursday, 6 December 2012

Let there be cookies

It’s cookie day! Yaay!

To be more specific, as every day is cookie day really, it’s the day of the Third Annual Great Online Cookie Exchange Extravaganza! Hugs and thanks go to Jz for creating and organising this sweet and biscuity event, and for letting me take part this year.

(Recipes, on my blog! Whatever next? :D)

My recipe is actually from a book as I wasn’t taught any at my Mum’s knee, but hopefully that’s okay. I can guarantee from personal experience that it makes very yummy cookies :)

One important thing before we begin: always make sure that there is a responsible adult in the kitchen when baking. Butter and chocolate are safe enough, but ovens can get very hot (and we will be boiling some water) and I don’t want anyone to get hurted.

Okay, aprons on!

Chocolate swirl cookies

  • 125g (4 1/2oz) butter, softened
  • 50g (2oz) icing sugar, sifted
  • 50g (2oz) cornflour (cornstarch)
  • 25g (1oz) cocoa powder
  • 100g (4oz) plain flour
  • 100g (4oz) dark or milk chocolate

  1. Preheat oven to 190˚C/375˚F (gas mark 5)
  2. Beat the butter in a large bowl until very soft
  3. Add all the other ingredients (except the chocolate) and mix together (with hands is easiest and funnest) until you have a gooey dough
  4. Take small balls of the dough and flatten them into the size and shape you want, then place each proto-cookie on a lined baking tray
  5. Bake for 10-12 minutes
  6. Remove from oven and allow to cool
  7. When the cookies have attained coolness, break the chocolate into little pieces and melt it in a heatproof bowl over a pan of boiling water
  8. Drizzle the molten chocolate all over the cookies with a spoon and leave it to set
  9. Remove cookies from baking tray(s) and devour! NOM nom nom! (Or put on a plate and serve; it’s up to you)
As befits a Cookie Extravaganza there are lots and lots of blogs with yummy recipes today, so hopefully every sweet tooth will find something that suits. Lookit:

Advizor54, aisha, Ally, Autumn in jeans, Beth, Dana, Elysia, Emi J, Fiona, Greengirl, Hedone, HisLilAngel, Joey, Julia, Jz, Krissy, lil, Linda Long, Little Monkey, mouse (her recipe here, her blog here), Mrs. Soft Bottom, Ms. Constance, Naughty Kitty, nilla, Ronnie, Ryan Beaumont, Sassy, selkie (her recipe here, her blog here), Serenity, sin, Striving for Peace, TemptingSweets, Tom, Veronica

That lot should keep even the most voracious of Cookie Monsters happy, I reckon! :D

Wednesday, 5 December 2012

Mrs Claus is comin' to town

Tis the season for giving, so in that spirit I would very much like to commend to your attention a very entertaining, very cute and very naughty book by my friend Anastasia Vitsky: The Vengeance of Mrs Claus. (Just the title gives you a wonderful shiver of anticipation, doesn’t it?)

The star of the piece is a troublesome miss called Claire Labraun: twenty-one and headstrong, Claire drives her parents to distraction with her constant disobedience. It is perhaps no surprise that this badly-behaved young lady has never been spanked... but that is all set to change this Christmas.

This spanking-hot story is as brand new and shiny as the first snowflake to fall from the sky, and is released this Saturday, December 8. It is available from the good folks at Blushing Books and Amazon in a mega-wide variety of formats, so if you’re after some hot holiday DD reading fun do please check it out!

N.B. Observant readers will notice that Mrs Claus is proudly displayed (as it were) up there on the right of my little lair: I want to do everything I can to help publicise Ana’s book so I will keep it there throughout the Christmas season. (Plus I was getting a bit fed up of seeing the same girl’s butt every day). Much more festive, I’m sure you’ll agree!

Tuesday, 4 December 2012

Comings and goings

A little post about kinky links today, as I have recently added a few blogs to my collection of dear sweet pals but not written a little piece about them (as is customary round here).

I was actually introduced to these new chums thanks to the Liebster Award, or more exactly thanks to Joey nominating us for it all together. (So it was about more than just random ephemera, see!) And I’m very glad I was introduced to them, as they are all three uniquely charming. Three distinct voices; three interesting, vibrant, female perspectives. I was going to say that the spanking blogosphere never ceases to amaze me with its capacity for variation and interest, but that isn’t really correct. What never ceases to amaze me is the endless capacity of people to be interesting and unique.

That’s probably enough sucking up and amateur thinkology, so I’ll just say hello! to Flipping SpankCakes, Lea’s Corner, and XOXO, Beth. I am very glad to have found you.

Oh, and you are all very, very naughty girls, by the way. But then you knew that already.

Now, a much sadder thing. I’m very sorry to report that the excellent and longstanding MarQe’s Study blog has been retired this week. Like the sadly missed Mr Whacker, MarQe’s blog was one of the first sites I linked to when I started blogging, and it was always one of my favourite reads. The endless array of teasingly erotic images and suggestive notes – each of which spoke volumes about the sensual, strict, female-adoring predilections of the man behind the blog – were a daily pleasure, but what came across most strongly of all, and what I enjoyed most of all, was the unique air of sophistication that radiated from the page. When visiting I always felt like I had been granted a peek into an English gentleman’s private parlour, and could watch, like a blushing maidservant might, the naughty and refined goings-on within.

Thank you for turning a bad girl on, Mr MarQe xx

Sunday, 2 December 2012

I will not show my panties off, I will not show my...

As you may have gathered from various past scribblings, I do rather enjoy school-type punishment. Not just the dressing-up and the spankings (though they are both extremely yummy), but the detentions and the lines and the corner time too. I love the feeling of being reduced in status; reduced to a naughty schoolgirl who can be ordered around and told off and set tedious, old-fashioned exercises ‘for her own good’. It’s deeply ironic, I’m sure, but I rarely feel as wonderfully free as I do when I’m in my uniform writing BORING, SILLY lines under pain of a thrashing.

Another favourite kinky thing of mine is ‘remote discipline’: that is, being taken in hand and punished by someone even though they aren’t physically present to grab me by the arm and swat my behind. So I was as happy as a Fifth Former with the keys to the tuckshop when I was introduced by a penpal (okay, by a strict Top who keeps me in line) to a website that combines both of these things: Line Punishment!

The name basically says it all: LP is an internet-y way to set someone (or even set yourself) lines as a punishment. There are lots of options that can be set, such as the number of repetitions, adding on extra lines for mistakes, and even having the line to be copied out flipped upside-down! Once a task has been set up, the line writer logs in, enters the appropriate access code and begins. There is a time limit for the task (set by the person who created it), and closing the browser window is logged, so once you start you had better see it through! I found that this condition gave me a wonderful sense of being seated at a school desk, beavering away at an inescapable and repetitive punishment, as if in detention under the watchful eye of a teacher. Yum.

Errors are logged, as is the time taken, and as the task setter knows the access code for your task he or she can check afterwards and see exactly how you did. And then take whatever action may be appropriate... :)

One option I didn’t much like was the insertion of random capital letters in the line to be copied out. So if, for example, the line is set as “I am a very naughty girl” it might appear as “I am A vEry naughtY girl” on the first repetition, “i aM a veRy nauGhty girL” on the second, and so on. Type a capital in the wrong place and that’s an error. While this ensures that the line-writer can’t cheat by copying and pasting the same line over and over, it is very counter-intuitive. (Some of us are honest about our punishments, you know!) Happily, a non-capitalised setting has recently been added so everyone is catered for. (And now I have no excuse to get out of my punishment, wah).

So there you have it. If you have a hankering for typing lines like a naughty little brat, Line Punishment is the website you need. And I think it might come in very useful for Miss Hasler’s naughty pupils, so be warned, class!

P.S. Should you ever find yourself writing lines in this virtual detention room, ignore the button on the line-writing screen that says ‘Submit Current Line’: just hit the Return key when you have finished each one. Much easier, trust me.

P.P.S. If anyone would like to set me lines anytime, do please feel free. I have been quite naughty of late, after all. And I definitely deserve to be made to write ‘I will vote for the Spankee of the Month’ a hundred or so times. (Sorry Aunty!)