One of the stories in the outrageously popular
Spank! 2 centres around something I have long been fascinated by (and had lots of delicious fantasies about): the spanking machine. Needless to say, the haughty and deserving female protagonist in my story finds herself strapped securely onto the machine and beaten mercilessly by it, her dignity stripped from her as completely as her skirt and panties are. It’s all very Kafkaesque, as she owns the company that manufactures the machine... I figured that would make for a fun reversal!
Happily for fans of such things, there seems to be no shortage of erotic artwork featuring spanking machines of all kinds:
Oh, the envy... I think the woman in the ultra-naughty Kami Tora pic wins the Luckiest Spankee prize (and is the one I would most ecstatically swap places with), but it’s really a case of win-win-win with all of them and with spanking machine art in general.
Given their popularity, it has always surprised me that spanking machines don’t seem to feature much in spanking fiction. I suppose a big reason is that the dynamic between a person and a machine is different to that between two (or more) people, and the lack of intimacy and human connection doesn’t lend itself to romance or emotional interplay. And perhaps what works well in picture form doesn’t always work so well in text. Which is a shame, as I think the cold, dispassionate nature of machines is fascinating when transplanted into a sexual and/or disciplinary context, and I would love to explore the area further. Maybe I will...
Anyway. To the ‘life imitating art’ part of this post! While I was writing my story I limited my research to drawings such as the ones above, and of course used my awesome imagination to envisage what a spanking machine might be like; how it would be built and operate. And I gave it what I thought an amusingly descriptive and corporate-sounding name: the
Spank-o-Matic 8000. (Confession. I watch shopping channels on TV sometimes, just for fun. The ‘before and after’ bits are always so funny. “Tired of struggling with tangled-up hoses?” LOL).
Imagine my surprise, then, when I happened some time after finishing my story – during the course of an entirely innocent internet meander – upon the real thing! There really
is a
Spank-O-Matic, lookit!
“The Spank-O-Matic is an automated, powered spanking machine capable of delivering a very wide range of sensations,” says the blurb. (Now I’m picturing this thing on a shopping channel: that would be awesome!)
“So you say the Spank-O-Matic can
OW! go from feather-soft to
OOH! blisteringly severe, Brad?”
“That’s right, Lacey! It can give even the most troublesome brat just what she needs and more!” (big smile to camera as Lacey’s bottom is paddled relentlessly)
And this ain’t the only spanking machine on the market, neither. From what I can gather there are two principal manufacturers and models: the Spank-O-Matic’s rival is the
Robospanker, from the good people at DD Machinery:
Definitely the sort of thing dreams are made of!
I have yet to try a spanking machine, but I have absolutely no doubt that they are great fun and I do someday hope to experience their thrillingly remorseless attentions. And, I have to say, I rather think that should I ever be fortunate enough to own one, I will leave the house a good deal less often. And invent many excuses for what I’m staying in to do. And not answer the phone while I’m doing it.
So, am I alone in my fascination? Do any of you get hot at the thought of being mounted on a bench and left to be spanked while your partner/disciplinarian pops out for a relaxing shopping trip? Do any of you
own a spanking machine? Please comment if so! :D
In the meanwhile I’ll leave the last word to poor Ms Sheely from ‘A Day in Court’ (available from Amazon in the bargainly-priced
Spank! 2: don’t delay, buy today!), extolling the virtues of the Spank-o-Matic 8000 as it toasts her naughty buns:
“The Spank-o-Matic can of course be used for-- ooh! d-disciplinary purposes, but our market research shows that eighty p-percent of owners purchase it for-- ow! recreation.”