Tuesday, 27 March 2012

Dance Dance Spanko (lution)

A rich source of playful sexiness in mainstream culture – and one that not everyone may be aware of – is the dance music video. Their highly charged nature isn’t very surprising, all things considered, as dance is intimately associated with youthful energy, hedonism and, well, sex. ‘Music to get nasty to’, one could call it. Of course, that same accusation has been levelled at all kinds of popular music since forever, but the key difference with dance is its unapologetic, unfettered celebration of carnality and its use of the video as a deliberate extension of that.

Even so, the majority of dance videos (in common with most other aspects of pop culture, sadly) are rather uninspired. But every so often one is made with a touch of originality and wit, elevating it above the norm. And every (every) so often, one is made with a touch of kink! With that in mind, here are a few favourites of mine that you might also enjoy...

Plug It In

Original is definitely a word that could be used to describe the video to Plug It In by Basement Jaxx: it centres on a factory that builds sexy fembots, several of which are ‘plugged in’ after hours and played with by two lecherous security guards. Naughty guards! The fictitious TV ads for the fembots are my favourite bit, and really speak to my nascent robot fetishism. (More on that in a future post).

The Creeps

The Creeps (Camille Jones/Fedde Le Grand) has pleasing overtones of Secretary-like submission (sounds like I’m describing perfume), with office hotties crawling to their male boss in an attempt to please. No spanking, sadly, but there’s lots of barely-contained lust and very inappropriate thrusting on desks, and it’s the sort of video that makes me think “I’d really like to be in her shoes.”

Hear My Name

That same sentiment is emphatically true of the most overtly kinky video in my little selection, Hear My Name (Armand Van Helden). I’m sure many of you will have seen it already, but in case you haven’t it features two elegantly strict ladies of leisure delivering OTK spankings to an endless line of naughty men and women. Really great atmosphere!


I want to give an honorary mention to two more videos that, whilst not kinky, are certainly hot (if you happen to like watching young ladies jiggling about) and really quite clever. Satisfaction (Benny Benassi) can be read as a satire on the conventions of advertising, a critique of the objectification of women, and even an ironic deconstruction of the dance video itself. But then on the other hand it may just be a sexy video full of girls using power tools. (In salacious, bouncing slow motion). Who can say?

Watch Out

Watch Out (Alex Gaudino ft Shena) is another reality-blurring, media-blending postmodernist babefest, with women in the role of soccer players in a video game played by the artists themselves. It’s all veryspanky sports’! Caution: contains extremely short shorts and plenty for the spanko imagination to run wild over.

I’m far from an expert on dance music, so the little list above simply comprises some of the videos that I happen to have watched and enjoyed. Feel free to add more in the comments! Oh, and the music in these videos may not be to everyone’s taste, so you might want to mute it. (I like it, but there you go).


  1. Miss Penelope, I enjoyed this different take - spanking to music! Why restict the selection to modern pop? I feel a really excellent choice would the '1812 Overture', with crashing cannons!
    That part of the overture could be looped to repeat again and again and you can guess what happens to the spankee,with every cannon shot!
    It would be best during a caning ,emphasising the loud whack!. Bang whack Ow! Bang ..!

  2. Hear My Name was extraordinary, I can remember watching a video clip program and almost falling off my chair when I saw that video. Bared Affair did an article about the making of the video (fictional of course), which has also appeared on my blog.